flightmum











{June 15, 2013}   Zombie Passengers

In this day and age, there are very few places that you come across that forces you to be unplugged.  “Do you have Wi-Fi on this aircraft?”, they always ask. The answer is NO.

So, people get on board and mentally try to prepare themselves  to be wireless for the next few hours.  But, it does not stop people from typing away e-mails on their BlackBerry or IPad so they can send them as soon as we land.

The flight passes uneventfully. But, as soon as we touch down safely on the ground, I make the obligatory safety announcements and then inform people that they can now use their cell phones. But, they do not hear me because they have already powered on without my blessing.

I look upon the sea of passengers in my cabin and they all look like they are sleeping. I look more carefully and see that their eyes are not closed but open ever so slightly, looking down at their mobile device. At first glance,  it looks like not a muscle is moving.  But then I zone in on their little thumbs moving a mile a minute typing away their ever important texts and emails. The cell phone zombies have awoken.

Looking into the zombie faces of the ‘phoners’ on the aircraft, reminds me of a Stephen King book called ‘Cell’ that I read many years ago about a mysterious signal that passes over the cell phone network and turns everyone into mindless zombie-like killers. In the book, there is a scene where all the phoners lie down in a soccer field at night and ‘switch off’ until morning while listening to weird music.  The next day,  they forage for food and kill whatever non-phoners they encounter. 

I think the phoners have won the battle. I rarely encounter non-phoners anymore while the plane is taxiing to the airport. The plane is filled with my zombie passengers who are at last reunited with their 3G network. 



et cetera